Some news...

Well mom, I hope that you are proud. I am down my first ten pounds. I still have a long way to go for my goal but I can do it. Life has not been easy for me. Things at work pretty much suck. I hate feeling miserable all day. I still like the job but things are spinning out of control on their end. We went to the doctors like we talked about doing and got some test results back that were upsetting but things can only get better from here. We did finally sign for the house and the mortgage. We officially move on May 17th. Dad has gone back to work full time. He is pretty lonely but does keep busy. Steve and I are still totally in love. His folks are officially in Ottawa now which is a scary thought but that as well is a good thing for us all. I finished two more assignments and have one left and the two modules then I get that piece of paper. Does life get any easier?

It is so funny to think of just how much I miss you and our little stupid gossip talks. Well I guess this will have to do. Oh I almost forgot to tell you, Nancy is pregnant. Lucky bugger. She is super happy. Don't worry you will be the first to know when we are.

So Jayme is acting distant again for some stupid reasons. I know that we need to talk but life is too short and I am not ready to deal with her. I have unresolved issues as does she. I just don't know how person can be such a double. I still love her and we will work it out. Lately, I have been very close with Amanda and Karine. It is so great to have old friends and new friends. They are all worth so much.

Well kirk is still away. I have not spoken to him in ages. Dad got something in the mail for him with more bad news so I think that he is dealing with that. I have to be honest about something. I have a lot of build up anger towards him and don't that I am ready for him to come home. I know that probably upsets you but there are too many other things going on in my life that I can't let him ruin them like it did for you. Please understand why I feel this way. WEll I am exhausted so I am heading to bed but please always remember that I love you and think of you always.

Mom, I hope that life on the other side is all that you wished for and hoped. I pray that it is all that we talked about and more. I sleep better thinking that you and Gran are watching me strruggling to survive and dealing with my private news. I have so much of you inside that I am sure that that is the reason why I can do it without you. Peace to you and all my loved ones with you.

Love you bunches
J